Impossible Things Stolen by Indian Thieves

One of our beloved states Where there are such lovely people Such amazing food- Not you. Such amazing food! Such great music. So many beautiful places. Some of my relatives live their dude! But due to some one percent people there- and their shenanigans- HEY. HEYYY. (Law after alliance with Luffy) But hello? There’s nothing wrong in this. (um so we going to ignore that?) They’re just solving the nation’s problems. Concerned about getting your phone and wallet stolen in the train? “In Bihar, some thieves stole the engine of a train.” If the train isn’t no more, there won’t be any thefts. The problem of taking a dump out in the open?”Thieves have stolen about 2 kilometres of rail from the railway line.” (Hot Wheels realistic update?) People are unaliving from accidents everyday? “-a 2 kilometres-long segment of the road was stolen.” Baby, I wanna see the Eiffel Tower on Valentine’s Day but without a passport.

(use television) Yes. Here? – YES. “-the entire mobile tower” “that was stolen.” GAVE THE DESI EIFFEL TOWER. “So, brother this is Bihar” “Anything is possible here.” The world plays GTA We live in GTA. (we got GTA Irl before GTA 6) If India were to lose the final match somewhere someday Here. The entire stadium would be stolen. Keep looking for the Australian team now.”-the limit was crossed when an entire 2km stretch of road was stolen” “when the people using this route daily reached here” “they were shocked.” The ground literally slipped from under their feet. “-then they came to know that the road was stolen.” But where did they hide the stolen road? What is in the LOCKER UNDER THE BED?? C-Chopra Link Road. We hid it here after stealing. Now technically we sleep on the streets.

After stealing the road what path did, they take for going home?? Shall we go on a long drive? No baby the road got stolen. If you don’t winna meet, then say it you excuse maker. Excuse- Go back to your ex. Even the bridge to her house has been stolen dude! Hello? “Thieves stole a 60 km long bridge in broad daylight” Nokia connecting people. Bihar disconnecting people. “The thieves chopped up the bridge in three days and loaded it into vehicles.” Was this my crush? Who slighted me in three days? And how did the people around did not realise?? The bridge really does be heavy. Very much. Oh, uncle nothing. This is Gupta’s uncle’s new furniture. His mosquito net. Aunty will grate ginger on this daily for the tea. You look that way no. Turn around. – Ignore. Shh. – Go. But the local people give very useful testimonies. “-okay who committed the theft?” “The theft was done by a person.” (NO WAY) REALLY???? WE THOUGHT A DOG DID IT! “The theft was done by a person.” “-the bridge was stolen in your village” “There’s a thief here that’s why it got stolen.” (omg the wisdom!) THANKS, DUDE THIS INFO WILL BE VERY USSEFUL FOR INVESTIGATION.

Please extend your feet the CBI wants to kiss them. “There’s a thief here that’s why it got stolen.” And he’s a fool so he did tomfoolery. After your Mordor the police will ask the same thing. Since he had bl00d, he was murdered. “Are you a ill sad?” “Yeah, a ill-” “How sad?” “I’m very sad” “Show us this sadness.” *Chuckles* “This is how sad he is look at him” This guy would LMAO at someone’s wake. (putting the ‘fun’ in funeral) “Social media star Poonam Pandey is no more.” (The PR manager be like) DOES ANYONE IN THIS VILLAGE EVEN CARE?? The mangled cadaver of the bridge is watching this from the heavens. RIP. Gone too soon. “After roads, metal bridge, mobile towers, an entire pond has been stolen.” “Thieves took away the pond.” Did someone slurp it up after mixing GluconD in it?? Theft in Bihar is like pimples on my face. Everyday new ones sprout! DAILY. Pack this. Pack that. (I want it, I got it) Pack all these trees. All the oxygen shall come to me. (Anish Kapoor claiming Vanta black be like) Pack all the oxygen. My team is carrying out the theft of the pool. The water has been packed, now the pool is being packed as well. Guys pack quickly, pack quickly. We don’t do trivial thefts bro. We took all the water. Pack all the crows.

Everything to be taken. Pack the entire washroom. Yo I am still inside- Pick it, pick it up. HEY, I’M STILL IN HERE- I’M STILL IN HERE. AAAAAAAA. Have you shifted here recently? No, you’re shifting elsewhere. Pack this entire building. Pack this too. (nil i would pack that too) Packed, your packed dude. (the car is not meowed) The entire tanker to be packed- SIIIIIR. The professor from Money Heist is here to take tuition from you. Damn dude these beginner students show up to take lessons. Villagers loot the road being made for them. Did this aunty like the road so much that she is removing the road?
It wasn’t even finished building yet.

Bro they removed the crust before the toppings even went in. You’ll try to make a cake for them and they’ll run away with the sugar. *motivational music of the horses running across green pastures* Such motivational music on theft? After listening to this even I picked up some bricks and stones.*glass crashes* THE CAR MET WITH AN ACCIDENT. What do you think? They’re taking out the person for taking to the hospital? NOPE. They’re taking out the magic drinks bottles to put in the fridge.

Let a person get deleted, we’ll give birth to two more. But free drinks won’t be here forever.

You’re calling the hospital, right? No, I’m calling my ferns to set the tone for the night. Pick two-three bottles and check under the person if some accompaniments are there.

Lift the body up. Lift and check. And don’t think of them as some noob thieves. They leave behind their signature like Dhoom’s Hrithik. Thieves wrote with the lipstick: “Sister in-law is very nice.” Why? Did she leave the safe open?? “First the thieves broke in and stole cash worth Rs 60 lakh (~$72,379)” “Then the thieves picked up a lipstick and wrote on the mirror of the dressing table:” “That sister in-law you’re very nice.” Dude I’m ruined and out on the streets now. (But at least I’m nice. (what genre of Wattpad-) “That sister in-law you’re very nice.” After reading this praise aunty took back two cases from the list. *mimics* Police brother, you only write theft worth Rs. 30 lakhs instead of 60.

They are kind people. Whenever they’re caught, do share their numbers Hihi “That sister in-law you’re very nice.” “Whereas they wrote bad words for brother.” (*Text: brother is a dumbass) Why? Did they not like his collection? Did his safe have underwear’s with holes? Or are you jealous, that he has sister in-law? “Whereas they wrote bad words for brother.” (#justiceforbrother) “The thieves also wrote thank you sister in-law” “May you be prosperous.” So that we can steal even more next time!! (long term investments) All this aunty wanted were the well wishes of thieves and dacoits. “-be prosperous.” Maybe while stealing they saw the family photo on the wall and fell for the sister in-law.

She looks like an actress Bruh. I’ll write a super chat for her. Message on the glass, and Rs 100 in the drawer. Which they had stolen from the wallet of the husband. They’ve written an entire love letter in the format of a language exam. To…comma…respected sir… Sister in-law. “-after stealing, the thieves have written a code on the wall.” “Which says R2FOH” (bro left a reagent formula) “The police is set on decoding it now.” (prolyl told them that the walls aren’t waterproof) A bridge is being stolen there. Roads are being stolen. And you want the police to solve this code for a theft of underwear??? AS IF. “-the code says R2FOH” Did they leave a coupon code of shampoo for this uncle? As a bribe? Perhaps he wrote cuss words, but the writing was so bad it looks like a code. And a sack for stolen money? NOPE. ¿Bag? NOPE. “-one of the thieves, started putting the bundles of notes in his pants-” Yeah so who all were posting 2024 smells like money?

THIS IS THE SMELL.

This is where the smell is coming from??? Bruh where tf you’re opening a fixed deposit?? The police would shy away from even searching there. *mimics* Why did I not wear a pajama with elastic band today?? Don’t relieve yourself after listening to the police siren.
Then water will be spilled over all your hard work. Now only the constable can break his Fixed Deposit. Fill in the blank! Inside the luxury car arrived____ Dash. Who could it be?
Minister? Salman’s driver? (let’s put a brake on that joke) GOAT THIEVES. (greatest of all times?) The child nappers were only able to afford an Omni vanned here goat thieves upgraded to luxury cars! And here a YouTuber has no car.

Choose your career wisely guys. Maybe dads of goats give more ransom. And Hrithik, white lime. Money Heist, red jumpsuits. Bihar? “in the dark of the night, a thief wearing ladies’ nighty broke into a house” “and commits the crime of theft.” “-wearing a ladies’ nighty-” HEY! THE THIEF IS RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. Dude, I have full evidence and proof. THIS GUY ROAMS ABOUT IN NIGHTY. No, I only wear my nighty in front of my husband I don’t wear it outside. (the plot was straight but now it isn’t) What? Keep all your organs in some bank locker because even they aren’t safe. Someone’s both kidneys were stolen. (return of lung hackers and heart thieves) And somewhere, a girlfriend cut off someone’s private- AAAAAAAA WHAT????”That girl calls the guy to an OYO hotel” “and chops off his private part” SHE CHOPPED IT OFF LIKE A LADY FINGER??? (more like a gent’s member-) “and chops off his private part” AAAAAA dude why does it hurt even listening to?? Many people got slighted in OYOs but not like this!! I am happily single bro.

I am happy single. Thanks, God, for blessing me with an ugly mug. It isn’t even a lizard’s tail that it will grow back. Mom! From the next time, bring this one from the market. Yeah. No more Doraemon themed neckband chops off his private part” “What is this?” (salami slicing) *LMAO* (Kj) And here, when you steal big things like engines and ponds, then nothing happens. But if by mistake, someone commits a smol theft then…

Man deleted for stealing…cauliflower. MAN, DELETED FOR STEALING….biscuits. MAN, BEATEN FOR STEALING… cycle. Mustard! (=similar sounding cuss word) Go and steal an airport. Steal Maldives. (hmm need of the hour) Cycle??? You’re lowering the standards?? Tho we got no respect, but still you’re lowering it??? LOWERING IT??? And they’re stealing schools from students. (students be like please do) “A 100 marks exam” “And the student got” “151 marks.” (bros lend me sum) “This happened in Bihar” SO MANY extra marks for good handwriting?? “151 marks out of 100 were given in political science paper.” (bro was Chanakya) Did they put a Rs.500 note in the paper or or gifted the stolen pond to sir? And the best thing. Even after scoring 151. “-you’ll be surprised to know” “that despite this the student was declared as failed.” (the increasing burden of studies) “declared failed as well” Sorry you were supposed to score 300 out of 100. Try again next time huh. Sent the ball outate the stadium. But the umpire declared an out. In the marks that could help five people pass this dude failed alone!!! “Similar thing happened with a BCom. student” (math wasn’t matching) “he scored a zero in exams” “then too he was promoted.” “Brother this is Bihar” “Anything is possible here.” What he must be thinking after seeing his report card? “I’ve been selected.?” “Yeah?” “My selection has been done??” “Dude, did someone send him, or they released him onto me?” “No, I can’t believe I have been selected.” “Got zero marks” “then too was promoted.” When all you wrote in the paper were lyrics but not of Honey Singh but Jagjit Singh.

(=popular Ghazal singer) Sir impressed. Even after seeing zero- “-he was promoted” University forgets to print question paper Exam postponed. Why sir? Do y’all forget to eat food as well? That you forger to print the paper? OOOOOOOOOOOO This is called revenge bro!! Revenge! Sirs bring your parents to the college tomorrow. No, we’ll have to talk to them sir. (how have the turns tabled) You forget to print so exam postponed. If we forget to study then career ruined?? Or maybe the school printer got stolen.

It is possible. University issues admit card with bike- (so now these are in Vogue?) Thirst trap here. THIRST TRAP ON ADMIT CARD AS WELL. So, this is how 151 marks are being scored. Extra marks for good figure. There are some people who steal money from their parents to fulfil the into! cation needs of their poor ferns in order to balance the good and the bad. Similarly, Robinhood thief! Who used stolen money to construct roads! “-used to commit thefts in high-profile homes” “now there’s a lot of respect for Irfan” See. And here we don’t get any respect at home. Even to this date! “There was a total of 11 people in Irfan’s gang” “this gang had his wife, fren, brother, girlfriend” (hold up) “and his driver” W-wait a minute. What???”there were a total of 11 people in Irfan’s gang” “this gang had his wife, fren, brother, girlfriend” Jaya and Rekha together???? He was playing Gambhir and Kohli in the same team bro! Collab between Apple and Samsung??? Messi and Ronaldo hand-in-hand???? Even I have a lot of respect for this thief! “-lot of respect for Irfan-” “but in the eyes of the villagers, Irfan is Robinhood because” “he completed the construction of at least 7 roads in the village.” They get the road built and the very road is stolen by someone.

So much employment he’s generating a man of God!!!! “-even gave Rs.20 lakhs for the cancer treatment of the neighbour’s daughter” told you in the beginning, right? Such nice people are there! Even God must be confused Should he be put in heaven or not. Washes away sins as quickly as washing hands with Dettol. Now for Bihar thieves: Goals for 2024.
New Year Resolutions for the thieves.

Steal at least 1-2 planes from Indigo. Anyway, they don’t fly in fog. Or steal Ambani’s entire home! And write on the mirror: sister in-law is very nice. For Nita sister in-law. And steal someone’s brain to give to Poonam Pandey. So that she stops respawning like a gamer. (=faked unloving to spread awareness on cancer) And lastly. Someone from Bihar steal my heart. (careful it might be more literal than figurative) Some lady. Ladies from Bihar don’t steal hearts but something else. NO. AAAAAA. (titans be like) “-chopped off his private part” So that is it for today guys. If you don’t winna fail even after scoring good marks, then subscribe dude. I’m also off to buy a metal underwear. Yeah, mom I’ll accompany you. *The annoying laugh track*

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